Monday, October 8, 2012

The new Company Policies!

Here I is: "Mr. Anil XYZ Malli" (67, Male, Tall, Dark and Handsome), Started his career as a trainee in the organization, 46 years back and now retiring as Senior Manager (taking home 25 lakes a year).

How Did it Started:
As I being the best employee entire career in the company, the Directors of the company called me to the Board of Director's meeting. Just to thank, whatever I have done for the company.

But before they said anything, I have put one proposal in front of them.

Give me some money and I will achieve all the targets of your next year, in next 6 months

What do you want from us? A sound came out of the Board.

I replied, One meeting where all your employees will be present, Except the board of directors, but they should be present the building where the meeting will occur.

The Meeting Day
I was standing in front of many employees , around table making a big circle, including the Sales and Development Team. (For the first time, my legs were shivering and my first voice came with hization [what I am going to do, is that right?] "Go...od mor..ning Every...one". I have never presented anything in-front)

Then I started, with: As you all know, This is my last day in the company, but I have taken some loan-money from the company and I am distributing this money among you people. This is my personal check-book, and I threw my check-book on the table. I have written name of all of you on these check, and some with the pictures also.

I picked up the check book and rolled it up (so individual check leaf can stand on the table). But I will give you this money, if you ....

The line that seperates
I tore one of the leaf from check-book and it had the name and his picture of Sales Team Head, I placed it on the table. Similarly I did for other 4 Sales person, with 1 lkh each. I drew a line on the table, and said, they will never interfere in any technology.

Then I made line of 5 Project Managers with 3 check each (as each was handling 3 projects in minimum), 50K each.

Then the line for 3 TLs (as each Project Manager has minimum 3 TLs under each), 33.333K each (Somehow make it 1lk).

And the last line for the 5 Developers (as each TL has 5 developers minimum in each project), 15K each.

Every-time you finish 1 project, you will be moved to a level up.

Then on the top, I made another line and I took 5 checks with pics of Board of Directors (Each have 5 Sales Head under them) and placed each, with amount 2 lks each.

Now the questions are:
1. How many Employees were there in the company?
2. How much money I have spent? What will be my profit, If I am earning 3 times what I am distributing?

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